…Hi!… my name’s Hieronymus… and I’m an eyeball!…

…it had to happen sum’time, I s’pose… I had a wee inkling recently that certain parts of my body were getting involved in stuff that I had no clue about… those of yeez who’ve followed my ‘Guess what bits of him are falling off, this week?‘ saga of late, will know that so far, since February dawned six weeks ago, upper parts of my inner thigh were attacked by an Angry Alien Abscess, which created the new Black Hole of Govan, perched on my inside leg… my meagre immune system railed manfully against that onslaught, but succumbed to an attack of the Shingles Squad, converting the left side of my face to a doppelgänger of the Phantom of the Opera, mask an’ all… that fusillade from pain-hell managed to infiltrate my left eye, blurring the vision so much I couldn’t properly see SKYNews on the television (a blessing, indeed, some cry!)…

…that infection was cleared up, to be instantly substituted with another infection of that same cornea… hum ho… this morning, the opthalmist tending my orbit disaster area declared the secondary infection vanquished, but says the cornea will now require ‘rehabilitation’... rehabilitation???… now it begins to dawn on me… that sneaky eyeball has been ‘at it’... rehabilitation from what?… drugs?… highly likely, as the peeper had been battered with drug-filled drops for weeks?… alcohol?… a strong possibility that the said drops had booze as a base constituent in them?…  whatever the cause, the eyeball has been eyemarked for rehab… I can mentally envision the picture (even if I can physically envision little else at present)…  a smoke-filled room in the basement at the back of some alleyway… a discreet notice on the door… ‘Eyeballs Anonymous’… my fella rolls in… ‘Hi,… my name’s Hieronymus… and I’m an eyeball!’

…and a posse of staring socket-fillers answer in unison, ‘Hi, Hieronymus!’… I really must get out more, Mabel… I really must get out more… see yeez later… LUV YEEZ!



Filed under Blether, Scribbling & Stuff

36 responses to “…Hi!… my name’s Hieronymus… and I’m an eyeball!…

  1. Good to see you’re keeping your spirits up. Keep an eye on your eye! Take lots of care, Seumas

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Christine Nedahl

    Be rehabilitated soon, Hieronymus. Is that don’t drop out of orbit as opposed to off the wagon??
    Here’s to your return to good health quickly, Seumas.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Aye well there you are! glad things are looking up (hehe) Oh that reminds me of my story Ali and the Eyeball – I wonder if I can find it. anyway – I hope your eye is soon back in line and stuff. xxx

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Hey Seumas. Good to see bits of you are still with us. 😉 Take care of yourself my friend and don’t overwork the Hiero. Sending you cyber hugs to defeat the gremlins, and wishing all parts of you well soon.
    Should I type MWAH in BIG? xx

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Heavens to Murgatriod! You are in the wars, aren’t you? … may an armistice be declared soon. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  6. That’s the trouble with casting your eye around a room when you walk into it – the little bu@@ers roll under settees – and you’ve heard the rumours about what lives under them!!!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Good to hear that you still have your sense of humour Seumas and it must have been a very worrying and also painful time. I hope you and your eyeball choose a form of rehabilitation that includes rest and relaxation somewhere luxurious. Get fully fit as quickly as possible. xx

    Liked by 1 person

  8. April Taylor

    You are going through such a tough time lately, big man. I am heartened by the fact you haven’t lost your sense of humour. Are you going to have to have an eye operation or is this problem a result of the bloody shingles? Whichever, get well soon.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Oh Seumas you good old lad! Keep your spirit up, you’ll win the battle of the eyeball. Take care old friend, you’re in my thoughts!🙏🙏

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Hope nothing else untoward happens Seumas. Glad you find the humour in the situation
    Nothing like a laugh to fight the eyeball blues!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Good to see you still have your sense of humor after everything, Seumas. It’s great you’re healing. Take care. 🙂 — Suzanne

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Keep truckin’ Jurassic – let’s speak soon

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Don’t rehab your eye too much. You have an eye for humor, writing, suspense, and drawing us all into your sphere of the world. Rehab or not – you’re the tops. (Now, relax, take care of yourself, and feel better!!) ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Faye

    Get well soon Seumas, The shingles are bad enough,Just got over them my self. Hope your vision improves soon so you can get back to your amazing life.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Oy. Sounds like a rough time. Be gentle with yourself and happy healing to you!

    Liked by 1 person

  16. OMG… believe me, I know how painful shingles is… and I didn’t have it anywhere near my eye. I’m sorry you had to go through that. But I admit, no matter what’s crossing your path, you still make me laugh. You take everything with your unique humor.
    Speedy recovery, Master Seumas!

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Reblogged this on Writer's Treasure Chest and commented:
    Master Seumas Gallacher and his health don’t get along well these days. But Seumas isn’t Seumas if he didn’t find humor even in this situation. Thanks for your smiles – and take care Master Seumas!!

    Liked by 1 person

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