…Jurassic I am… Jurassic I’ll remain… R.I.P. Blackberry mine…

aaaaa…I am unashamedly the supposed possessor of an abnormally high IQ… which means NUTHIN more than my brain seems able instinctively to figure out matters of logic… ‘logic’... stuff that makes sense… my affinity with numbers had me gravitate to an early career as a Trainee  Master of the Financial Universe as a foreign exchange trader in banks in London, Hong Kong and Singapore… no less impressive (at least to my granny), is the ability to fathom words from scattered letters… anagrams come easily, as does the odd, peculiar turn of phrase when I toy with the wordsmithing metier… so why, why, why, when it comes to compoootery stuff like laptops and mobile phones do I appear as sharp as a billiard ball?… I think it has sum’thing to do with the fact that I prefer to do mental arithmetic calculations rather than use a calculator… I’d rather devise WURDS in my head than go Google the online thesauri (that’s me showing off, Mabel… plural for ‘thesaurus‘… see what I mean?)…  so when it comes to trying to get my wee grey cells to understand the machinations of iStuff, my brain seizes up… for years I used a Blackberry… and it took most of these years to half-figure out how it operated… what buttons to press to do simple things like making a phone call to sumb’dy on my contacts list… and don’t talk to me about ‘apps’‘apps’… the shortened version of ‘stuff that gives Master Gallacher apoplexy’… imagine then the enormity of my grief when the faithful Blackberry ultimately had to be replaced… it shuffled off to that Great Big Device-Paradise in the Sky… getting a new Blackberry, I was advised, was ‘not a good idea’ as they are about to go obsolete, sumb’dy said… bit like myself, really… long story short, a purchase was made in the last month of a Samsung...

aaaaaaaaaaa

…not the amusing exploding model, but one with traits which are just as bad… its predictive text is producing a whole new language to baffle my friends… as if they weren’t puzzled enuff with the cryptic messages I used to send… and gazillions of overlapping virtual pages on the wee screen… all I want is to be able to send and receive texts and phone calls .. is that too much to ask, or as Monster Samsung Predictive Text says, ‘Is ham due such a cask?’… if yeez need me , I’ll be out looking for a telephone box…

aaaaaaa

…y’know, that big red cubicle with lots of little glass windows and a coin-pay thingy that lets you talk to people… Jurassic I am… Jurassic I’ll remain… R.I.P. Blackberry mine… see yeez later … LUV YEEZ!

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22 Comments

Filed under Blether, Scribbling & Stuff

22 responses to “…Jurassic I am… Jurassic I’ll remain… R.I.P. Blackberry mine…

  1. I feel your pain… Over the years I’ve persistently stubbed my toe on the new technology, but gritted my teeth and got stuck in – the realisation that I’d simply be left behind was sharp enough to force me ever onward. BUT the hours and hours of blood, sweat and tears I’ve expended grappling with aspect of the new technology that the generations coming up behind me have a sixth sense for, makes me realise my brain is simply differently wired:).

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  2. Our phone box houses a book/dvd exchange… i suppose it is possibly the only place where Harry met Sally ontop of Braveheart… interesting but won’t order you a chinese takeaway on a dank Friday night.

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    • Our local phone box houses a wino who asks money for people to get in and use the phone. I do like private enterprise.

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      • You have to hand it to him he is keeping dry and using all the entrepreneur skills he can muster. You should invite him for Christmas then you will keep him warm and fed and folks in the community can utilise his absence to call friends and family. Winners all round. 😉

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  3. OAnd ypu can’t call a doctor from there if you come over hot and look a bit peelywally😯😕

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Yep, all the bells-and-whistles on my phone leave me cold. I text, I make (and mostly receive) phone calls, and I take photos, that’s it!

    You’ve got to look out for those rep phone boxes though. I heard tell of a bloke who travels through time and dimensions in one of ’em! 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Ugh, I’m sorry for your loss. I have a ‘newfangled’ I-phone but do as little on it as possible. Took my 8-year-old granddaughter to a Christmas ballet on Sunday, and over hot chocolate at intermission, she showed me a dozen new ways to text/photograph/send selfies/WRITEatext in cursive and god knows what else. Damn little ‘un, showing off…..

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  6. Osama

    Just wait for some time, you will be in love with your new smart mobile. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I loved by ancient Blackberry – it had no problem making/taking phone calls and email was prompt. It was a discard from another more trendy family member. They had to pry it out of my hands when it died.
    I have an (ancient) iPhone given by those embarrased by my flip phone (which also worked well and was best of all small. So now I get calls pretty much all the time, get emails and texts and take pictures…lots of pictures – who knew? It may do lots of other tricks, but really I have other things to do.
    Somehow we dinos survive just fine – surprisingly happily

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  8. I was feeling chuffed when my niece said she lurved my old mobile, until the word ‘antique’ was mentioned. 😀 I did buy one of those i-thingies, which tends to sit unloved and unwanted in the bottom of my handbag while I resort to the one that doesn’t need prodding and poking and apping and sliding and rearranging little icons which are just put there to confuse anyone over ahem, twenty-five and a bit.
    By the time you’ve discovered how to do something it’s obviously Sooo last year Darlink and will have been replaced anyway. Don’t laugh but have you considered a ‘Doro?’ They do silly things like receive phone calls, send messages, and some even take pictures. 😉 LoL. x

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  9. Dear Seumas, I too am one of the poor souls who had one day to give up my Blackberry and switched to Samsung. *sigh* – But feel comforted. I got how to use it – which means, you’ll get it too, don’t worry! 🙂

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  10. I understand perfectly. It took both my children to teach me to use a computer, plus I experimented. I don’t have a smartphone. I don’t feel comfortable having a phone that’s smarter than me. I stick to a small mobile with the basics. Mine is almost indestructible. I know as I’ve dropped it a number of times. A smartphone would have probably been destroyed by now. All the best, Seumas. 🙂 — Suzanne

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