…Edward, Hammer of the Scots… in yer best rigid leather…

corporal punishment is an evocative term in many quarters these days… for almost the past thirty years in the UK, it has been banned in public schools, and it still remains a divisive and sensitive topic… it seems astonishing to me that even parents are limited in administering any kind of physical ‘what-fors’ to errant offspring…. don’t mistake me here, I’m not advocating wholesale battering the hell out of yer children… but ask emb’dy who lived in the 40s and 50s in the UK what happened to yeez when yeez did sum’thing really upsetting to yer parents back then?… most likely a clip round the ear, or a healthy smacking of yer nethers… and here’s where this ol’ Jurassic’s gonna upset a few people… I received my own (totally deserved) share of ‘laying-on-of-smacking-hands’… did it turn me into a psychopathic monster?… a twisted hate-filled individual?… a grudge-bearing-creature-against-all-society-for the rest-of-my-life?… I rather think not… at the age of twelve, the young Master Gallacher joined thirty other boys in his first year class at the then all-male school, Allen Glen’s High School of Science, in Glasgow, endearingly described as ’tiled halfway up inside like a public lavatory’

allen

…teachers were a different breed then… most were carved out of yer worst nightmares, fed by apocryphal stories from the more senior boys, winding-up the ‘newbies’… one magnificent professorial specimen rejoiced in the name ‘Butch’ Herd, a bald-headed tyrant of a history teacher… the first day’s class under his tutelage is impaled forever in the memory… it began with the man asking the front-desk inhabitant, a lad called Morris Minor (yeez can guess the kinda motoring nicknames he acquired) to shift out of his seat… he then placed a three-inch length of board-writing chalk on top of the desk… next, from a hook on the inside door of his cupboard he removed a two-and-a-half-foot length of rigid leather belt…

teacher

…‘gentlemen, observe’ he instructed… and with a violent downward motion he flailed at the chalk… the solid leather tawse pulverised the stick of chalk to a white powder… we watched hypnotised and not just a tad terrorised… ‘this is Edward, gentlemen… and yer history will tell yeez that Edward was known as the ‘Hammer of the Scots’… we don’t want to meet him again this term do we?’… bluudy right, we didn’t… Butch’s classes were always the best behaved, and strangely enuff, produced the best exam results… funny that, eh?… see yeez later… LUV YEEZ!

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7 Comments

Filed under Blether, Scribbling & Stuff

7 responses to “…Edward, Hammer of the Scots… in yer best rigid leather…

  1. Pingback: …Edward, Hammer of the Scots… in yer best rigid leather… | Seumas Gallacher

  2. A teacher doing this today will first be fired and then find himself in front of a judge. He will make the news in TV and all over the web. For mentally torturing innocent young people. And just for reducing chalk to powder

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  3. We still had the belt or “tash” as it was known in the East when I came down from Orkney, for the end of 1st year to Lossiemouth. I got the tash a few times, once for not doing homework, once for chewing gum, and another time for ehrm can`t remember but it`s never been an issue with me. The guys used to have bruises on their wrists and stuff but no parents complained. Different days when now a teacher can`t even raise his/her voice to a student before the hankie brigade are oot and aboot.

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  4. That is something. I can imagine the terror that struck into every student in the class. I got smacked once by my mother and it did me no harm. What I wonder about is the poor children who are beaten half to death and no one reports it. Sometimes the beater succeeds in going the whole way to actual death and everyone is surprised it happened. It’s not spotted unless one of the parents takes the child to a hospital. —- Suzanne

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