…Scots?… wha’s like us?… damn few, an’ they’re a’ deid…

Abu Dhabi Yoda with the Force

…before yeez all go running off to the Berlitz Language School in search of  translations for the header up there… it paraphrases into English (which, by the way is the ultimate foreign language for emb’dy else on the planet, but we’ll discuss that another day), simply as, ’Scots? who’s like us? damn few and they’re all dead’… there can be few other nations past or present who have given freely to the WURLD of ’strangenesses’… these peculiarities are a boon to the rest of Mankind inasmuch as they exercise yer brains… make yeez ponder, ‘What?’, ‘Why?’ or p’raps even ‘WTF?’… who else could transform an instrument that resembles a tartan-clad octopus into a delivery mechanism for the music of the Gods?…


bagpipes…a lone piper on a castle battlement, playing the pibroch will stir the soul even of a moribund English politician (well, p’raps that’s pushing it too far, Mabel)… then turn yer attention to the glorious production of the Water of Life… Scotch whisky… uisge beatha… the electric soup… capable of converting the shyest individual into a champion ball room dancer, singer, romancer-extraodinaire of gentleladies, at least in their own minds, bless ‘em…whisky

we also instil in our menfolk the fearless habit of wearing kilts… ‘is anything worn under yer kilt, Mister?’… ‘if there was anything worn underneath, it wouldn’t be a kilt, lassie… it would be a skirt’… nuffsed… and as for the kilt sporran…

sporran where else would yeez find a hairy, tasselled pouch, hanging in front of a male’s anatomy, into which he bundles his money, postal orders from his Mam, and his haggis lunch sandwiches?… speaking of which, haggis, or, well, maybe not…haggis

but no Michelin star people have ever fathomed what it truly is… an excuse to pour outrageous measures of whisky as ‘sauce’ over yer meat before yeez eat it… a further delicacy, unmatched in the cuisinery of the universe is the famous Deep-Fried Mars Bars…

mars bars


…now what genius could come up with that one? …a ploy manufactured as an eternal income generator for heart doctors all over Caledonia… I could rail on adinforeverum with more of the wondrous products of the Scots inventive mind, but I think that’s prob’ly enuff for yeez to internalise for one day… Slainte Mhath!… see yeez later… LUV YEEZ!


P.S. …now, here’s a first for yeez… it’s no secret that I’m as adept on computer-y things as a one-armed paper-hanger… my good pal, Susan Jamieson, she of the splendid Owls and Orchids web page, enquired as to why I hadn’t included a picture of a bottle of Laphroaig Scotch Whisky  by the way with a name like ‘Jamieson’, she’s only an ‘i’ away from the Irish drappie), so I tried to get one into my reply column… I’m afraid my computer education only runs all the way from ‘A’ to ‘just a wee bit after ’A’… so this postscript addendum solves the issue… see, I’m not half as dumb as I look!…


…cheeeeeeeers, m’Lady, Susan…


Filed under Blether, Scribbling & Stuff

25 responses to “…Scots?… wha’s like us?… damn few, an’ they’re a’ deid…

  1. That’s great Seumas. What grand items the Scots have given to the world. The “sporran” seems to be quite a useful item. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Your blether always makes me smile 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Reposted. Having just got back I’m a bit homesick – still hits us even after all this time.
    A sporran – the original willy-warmer?

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Any nation that hunts the wild haggis has to be special 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  5. As the button says, ‘If it ent Scottish, it’s crrrap.’ But I’m still confused by vegetarian haggis… it seems to defeat the purpose…

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Thanks for the new word, Seumas. Love yeez adinforeverum!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Reblogged this on Wendy Anne Darling and commented:
    Thanks for the new word, Seumas. Love yeez adinforeverum!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Great! You should consider your own dictionary too….

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Thank you Seamus.
    On a dismal day you have more than brought a smile to my face. Although I can’t understand why there’s no picture of a bottle of Laphroaig on your post… a heaven sent tipple if ever I met one. I wish could employ a little colour in my response but I just don’t have the blether you handle so dextrously. 😁
    Though I did like Ailsa’s comment about the “willy warmer”. I think I need a few lessons 😄
    Born on the wrong side of the border
    DNA says Celtic through n through
    Gawd I need some order
    Or a Scotch or three will do.

    Slainte a nighean (right or wrong guess)
    Susan 💖

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Seamus- a man after my heart, well taste buds at least.😉
    Tis true I’m afraid that I’m only an ‘I’ away from the Irish tipple, but it makes all the difference. Now Laphroaig such ambrosia,
    I appreciate its inclusion,
    without which there’d be much delusion, and I’ll promise you dearly
    there’s no tipple tasted deary
    but the one I now raise in yer honor.
    Slainte Mhath.💖

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Pingback: …Scots?… wha’s like us?… damn few, an’ they’re a’ deid… | Seumas Gallacher

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.